Here are some of the books that we’ve included in our research
Why am I Attracted to the Bad Boy: Examining the Psychology & Physiology of Attachment & Betrayal Bonds - Dr. Sharon Baty.
This book examines factors that contribute to unhealthy relationship choices. It helps the reader identify unconscious and even conscious reinforcers and answers the question about why we choose a particular partner. The answer is hypothesized to be rooted in attachment theory , social learning theory, humanistic theory, psychodynamic theory and instrumental/operant conditioning. This easy to read book attempts to answer the "why" question, but also the "now what?" question as well.
The Body Keeps the Score: Mind, Brain and Body in the Transformation of Trauma - Bessel Van Der Kolk.
The effects of trauma can be devastating for sufferers, their families and future generations. Here one of the world's experts on traumatic stress offers a bold new paradigm for treatment, moving away from standard talking and drug therapies and towards an alternative approach that heals mind, brain and body. 'Van der Kolk draws on thirty years of experience to argue powerfully that trauma is one of the West's most urgent public health issues ... Packed with science and human stories' New Scientist 'Breathtaking in its scope and breadth, a seminal work by one of the preeminent pioneers in trauma research and treatment' Peter A. Levine, author of In An Unspoken Voice 'Dr. van der Kolk's masterpiece combines the boundless curiosity of the scientist, the erudition of the scholar, and the passion of the truth teller' Judith Herman, author of Trauma and Recovery
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos - Jordan Peterson.
Acclaimed clinical psychologist Jordan Peterson has influenced the modern understanding of personality, and now he has become one of the world's most popular public thinkers, with his lectures on topics from the Bible to romantic relationships to mythology drawing tens of millions of viewers. In an era of unprecedented change and polarising politics, his frank and refreshing message about the value of individual responsibility and ancient wisdom has resonated around the world.
Puer Papers - James Hillman and others
Nine essays elaborating the puer figure - the spirit of youth and the youth of spirit - through explorations in myth, literature, pathology, and archetypal psychology: Senex and Puer by James Hillman; Peaks and Valleys by James Hillman; American Learns by Henry A. Murray; Puer Wounds and Ulysses' Scar by James Hillman; Puer's Wounded Wing: Reflections on the Psychology of Skin Disease by Randolph Severson; Notes on Opportunism by James Hillman; Artemis and the Puer by Tom Moore; Puer Aeternus: The Figure of Innocence in Melville by James Baird; On Finnegans Wake by Thomas Cowan..
Cheap Sex: The Transformation of Men, Marriage, and Monogamy - Mark Regnerus
Cheap Sex takes readers on an extended tour inside the American mating market, and highlights key patterns that characterize young adults' experience today, including the timing of first sex in relationships, overlapping partners, frustrating returns on their relational investments, and a failure to link future goals like marriage with how they navigate their current relationships. Drawing upon several large nationally-representative surveys, in-person interviews with 100 men and women, and the assertions of scholars ranging from evolutionary psychologists to gender theorists, what emerges is a story about social change, technological breakthroughs, and unintended consequences. Men and women have not fundamentally changed, but their unions have. No longer playing a supporting role in relationships, sex has emerged as a central priority in relationship development and continuation. But unravel the layers, and it is obvious that the emergence of "industrial sex" is far more a reflection of men's interests than women's.
Sapiens - Yuval Noah Harari
We are the most advanced and most destructive animals ever to have lived. What makes us brilliant? What makes us deadly? What makes us Sapiens? In this bold and provocative book, Yuval Noah Harari explores who we are, how we got here and where we’re going. Sapiens is a thrilling account of humankind’s extraordinary history – from the Stone Age to the Silicon Age – and our journey from insignificant apes to rulers of the world ‘It tackles the biggest questions of history and of the modern world, and it is written in unforgettably vivid language. You will love it!’ Jared Diamond, author of Guns, Germs and Steel.
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love - Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
Is there a science to love? In this groundbreaking book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory - the most advanced relationship science in existence today - can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many best-selling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships - until now.
Violence, Reflections on a national epidemic - James Gilligan, M.D.
Drawing on firsthand experience as a prison psychiatrist, his own family history, and literature, Gilligan unveils the motives of men who commit horrifying crimes, men who will not only kill others but destroy themselves rather than suffer a loss of self-respect. With devastating clarity, Gilligan traces the role that shame plays in the etiology of murder and explains why our present penal system only exacerbates it. Brilliantly argued, harrowing in its portraits of the walking dead, Violence should be read by anyone concerned with this national epidemic and its widespread consequences.
The Creation of Patriarchy - Gerda Lerner
A major new work by a leading historian and pioneer in women's studies, The Creation of Patriarchy is a radical reconceptualization of Western civilization that makes gender central to its analysis. Gerda Lerner argues that male dominance over women is not "natural" or biological, but the product of an historical development begun in the second millennium B.C. in the Ancient Near East. As patriarchy as a system of organizing society was established historically, she contends, it can also be ended by the historical process.
Marriage, a History - Stephnie Coontz
Just when the clamor over "traditional" marriage couldn’t get any louder, along comes this groundbreaking book to ask, "What tradition?" In Marriage, a History, historian and marriage expert Stephanie Coontz takes readers from the marital intrigues of ancient Babylon to the torments of Victorian lovers to demonstrate how recent the idea of marrying for love is—and how absurd it would have seemed to most of our ancestors. It was when marriage moved into the emotional sphere in the nineteenth century, she argues, that it suffered as an institution just as it began to thrive as a personal relationship. This enlightening and hugely entertaining book brings intelligence, perspective, and wit to today’s marital debate.
Sex and World Peace - Valerie M. Hudson, Bonnie Ballif-Spanvill, Mary Caprioli & Chad F. Emmett
Sex and World Peace unsettles a variety of assumptions in political and security discourse, demonstrating that the security of women is a vital factor in the security of the state and its incidence of conflict and war. The authors compare micro-level gender violence and macro-level state peacefulness in global settings, supporting their findings with detailed analyses and color maps. Harnessing an immense amount of data, they call attention to discrepancies between national laws protecting women and the enforcement of those laws, and they note the adverse effects on state security of abnormal sex ratios favoring males, the practice of polygamy, and inequitable realities in family law, among other gendered aggressions.
Why does he do that - Lundy Bancroft
In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft—a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men—uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued in a relationship, and to find ways to get free of abuse. In Why Does He Do That? you will learn about: • The early warning signs of abuse • The nature of abusive thinking • Myths about abusers • Ten abusive personality types • The role of drugs and alcohol • What you can fix, and what you can’t • And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely
Rethinking Domestic Violence - Donald G Dutton
Rethinking Domestic Violence reviews research in the area of intimate partner violence. The research crosses disciplinary lines, including social and clinical psychology, sociology, psychiatry, criminology, and criminal justice research. Since the area of intimate partner violence is so heavily politicized, Don Dutton tries to steer through conflicting claims by assessing the best research methodology. As a result, he comes to some very new conclusions about intimate partner violence. After twenty years of viewing intimate partner violence as generated by gender and focusing on a punitive “law and order” approach, Dutton now argues that this approach must be more varied and flexible. Treatment providers, criminal justice system personnel, lawyers, and researchers have indicated the need for a new view of the problem – one less invested in gender politics and more open to collaborative views and interdisciplinary insights. Rethinking Domestic Violence will be of interest to psychologists, policymakers, and those dealing with the sociology of social science, the relationship of psychology to law, and explanations of adverse behaviour.
The Dance of Intimacy: A women’s guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships - Harriet Lerner
In The Dance of Intimacy, the bestselling author of The Dance of Anger outlines the steps to take so that good relationships can be strengthened and difficult ones can be healed. Taking a careful look at those relationships where intimacy is most challenged--by distance, intensity, or pain--she teaches us about the specific changes we can make to achieve a more solid sense of self and a more intimate connectedness with others. Combining clear advice with vivid case examples, Dr. Lerner offers us the most solid, helpful book on intimate relationships that both women and men may ever encounter.
The social psychology of gender: How Power and Intimacy Shape Gender Relations - Laurie A. Rudman and Peter Click
Gender relations are rife with contradictions and complexities. Exploring the full range of gender issues, this book offers a fresh perspective on everyday experiences of gender; the explicit and implicit attitudes that underlie beliefs about gender differences; and the consequences for our thoughts, feelings, and behavior. Many real-world examples illustrate how the unique interdependence of men and women—coupled with pervasive power imbalances—shapes interactions in romantic relationships and the workplace. In the process, the authors shed new light on the challenges facing those who strive for gender parity. This ideal student text takes readers to the cutting edge of gender theory and research.
Man up: Surviving Modern Masculinity by Jack Urwin
Jack Urwin's father died just before Jack turned 10. Being male, he never really learned to talk about this with any kind of sincerity. His grief stayed with him through his teens, slowly becoming depression. Now 24 and a journalist whose recent Vice article, A Stiff Upper Lip Is Killing British Men - described as 'fabulous' by Irvine Welsh - became a viral sensation, Urwin explores what it means to be a man now. He traces crises of masculinity from our grandfathers' inability to deal with the horrors of war to the mob mentality of football terraces or Fight Club and the disturbing rise of mental health problems among men today. Smart, funny and friendly, but with a wisdom that belies the author's age, Man Up is the start of an essential conversation for men, exploring why we have perpetuated the myth of masculinity - and how we can challenge it and change it.
The emotional terrorist and the violence prone - Erin Pizzey
In this important book, suppressed in England, Pizzey argues that not every battered woman is simply a victim. To successfully reduce violence, Pizzy convincingly shows that domestic violence prevention workers must distinguish between the emotional terrorist, addicted to pain and provoking violence, and those truly seeking escape from violence. This is the successor to "Scream Quietly or the Neighbours Will Hear";, the first book on wife battering. It is a challenging must-read for all those dealing with family violence, policy-makers, family rights activists and anyone concerned about violence in society. The book contains the updated text of the original book, suppressed in England, minus outdated appendices, plus Pizzey s new research and conclusions comparing battered women and violence-prone women. A separate section describes the "emotional terrorist";, a personality instantly recognizable to their targets.
Angry White Men - Michael Kimmel
Sociologist Michael Kimmel, one of the leading writers on men and masculinity, has spent hundreds of hours in the company of America's angry white men--from white supremacists to men's rights activists to young students--in pursuit of a comprehensive diagnosis of their fears, anxieties, and rage. Kimmel locates this increase in anger in the seismic economic, social, and political shifts that have transformed the American landscape: Downward mobility, increased racial and gender equality, and tenaciously clinging to an anachronistic ideology of masculinity has left many men feeling betrayed and bewildered. Raised to expect unparalleled social and economic privilege, white men are suffering today from what Kimmel calls "aggrieved entitlement": a sense that those benefits that white men believed were their due have been snatched away from them.
Sexual Personae by Camille Paglia
Here is the fiery, provocative, and unparalleled work of feminist art criticism that launched Camille Paglia’s exceptional career as one of our most important public intellectuals. Is Emily Dickinson “the female Sade”? Is Donatello’s David a bit of pedophile pornography? What is the secret kinship between Byron and Elvis Presley, between Medusa and Madonna? How do liberals and feminists—as well as conservatives—fatally misread human nature? This audacious and omnivorously learned work of guerrilla scholarship offers nothing less than a unified-field theory of Western culture, high and low, since Egyptians invented beauty—making a persuasive case for all art as a pagan battleground between male and female, form and chaos, civilization and daemonic nature.
They Fucked you up - how to survive family life - Oliver James
In this groundbreaking book, clinical psychologist Oliver James shows that it is the way we were cared for in the first six years of life that has a crucial effect on who we are and how we behave. Nurture, in effect, shapes our very nature. In a remarkable analysis of science and popular culture, James combines the latest research with revealing case studies, interviews, and biographies with the likes of Michael Jackson, Mia Farrow, and Prince Charles to prove his point. In addition to presenting his findings, James explains how they can be a source of liberation in our lives. Through the use of provocative questions and insightful examples, he helps readers better understand the way their childhood past is affecting their present and how to "be your own scriptwriter." He also argues that his findings could have huge implications for society as a whole. A top-seller and recipient of significant attention in the U.K., They F*** You Up is an opinionated, entertaining read which causes us to ponder the origins of our present behavior.
The Wolf in a Suit - Anita Bentata
The Wolf in a Suit is not just the true and uncensored story of a young Australian mother and her children living in violence and torment. This book also contains solutions and understandings about how women get caught, why women stay, what is required for true healing and how as an individual, professional and community we need to grow beyond the current limited mindset and major gaps of knowledge.
Mating in Captivity: Sex, Lies and domestic bliss - Esther Perel
A New York City therapist examines the paradoxical relationship between domesticity and sexual desire and explains what it takes to bring lust home. One of the world’s most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home. Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.
Sexual Coercion in Primates and Humans - Martin N. Muller and Richard W. Wrangham
In only a few species do males strategically employ violence to control female sexuality. Why are females routinely abused in some species, but never in others? And can the study of such unpleasant behavior help us to understand the evolution of men's violence against women? The book presents extensive field research and analysis to evaluate sexual coercion in a range of species - including all of the great apes and humans - and to clarify its role in shaping social relationships among males, among females, and between the sexes.
Dealing with A narcissist - Darlene Lancer
Codependency author and expert Darlene Lancer explains the narcissist's mind and motives and the personality of their partners. Dealing with a Narcissist reveals the unconscious forces driving their mutual attraction and relationship dynamics and sheds light on the damaging impact narcissists have on their partners and children. This is also workbook with strategies that can improve your self-esteem and help you maintain your self-respect and set boundaries with addicts, narcissists, an abusive parent, co-worker, or other relationship involving partner abuse.
To be a man - Robert Augustus Masters
I’ve got it all—a great job, relationship, and lifestyle—so why do I feel so dissatisfied and disconnected? Why am I not happier in my intimate relationships? How do I become more powerful—without becoming that jerk everyone dislikes? Robert Augustus Masters has helped thousands of men address and work through such issues. What he’s found is that the common solution to these dilemmas is challenging yet clear: we must face our unresolved wounds, shame, and whatever else is holding us back, bringing “our head, heart, and guts into full-blooded alignment.” With To Be a Man, this acclaimed psychotherapist and relationship expert offers a groundbreaking and deeply insightful guide to masculine power and fulfillment. To Be a Man clarifies what’s needed to enter a manhood as strongly empowered as it’s vulnerable, as emotionally literate as it’s unapologetically alive—a manhood at home with truly intimate relationship.
Hold Me Tight: Your Guide to the Most Successful Approach to Building Loving Relationships - Sue Johnson
Developed by Dr Sue Johnson over 20 years ago and practised all over the world, EFT has been heralded by Time magazine and the New York Times as the couple therapy with the highest rate of success. Couples who use EFT see a 75 per cent success rate. The therapy programme focuses on the emotional connection of every relationship by de-escalating conflict, creating a safe emotional connection, and strengthening bonds between partners. In HOLD ME TIGHT, EFT pioneer Dr Sue Johnson presents her highly effective therapy model to the general public for the first time. Through case studies from her practice, illuminating advice and practical exercises, couples will learn how to nurture their relationships and ensure a lifetime of love.
Dude you’re a fag - C. J. Pascoe
High school and the difficult terrain of sexuality and gender identity are brilliantly explored in this smart, incisive ethnography. Based on eighteen months of fieldwork in a racially diverse working-class high school, Dude, You're a Fag sheds new light on masculinity both as a field of meaning and as a set of social practices. C. J. Pascoe's unorthodox approach analyzes masculinity as not only a gendered process but also a sexual one. She demonstrates how the "specter of the fag" becomes a disciplinary mechanism for regulating heterosexual as well as homosexual boys and how the "fag discourse" is as much tied to gender as it is to sexuality.
Why We Lie: The evolutionary roots of deception and the Unconscious Mind - David Livingstone Smith
Deceit, lying, and falsehoods lie at the very heart of our cultural heritage. Even the founding myth of the Judeo-Christian tradition, the story of Adam and Eve, revolves around a lie. Our seemingly insatiable appetite for stories of deception spans the extremes of culture from King Lear to Little Red Riding Hood, retaining a grip on our imaginations despite endless repetition. These tales of deception are so enthralling because they speak to something fundamental in the human condition. The ever-present possibility of deceit is a crucial dimension of all human relationships, even the most central: our relationships with our own selves. Why We Lie elucidates the essential role that deception and self-deception have played in evolution and shows that the very structure of our minds has been shaped from our earliest beginnings by the need to deceive. Smith shows us how, by examining the stories we tell, the falsehoods we weave, and the unconscious signals we send out, we can learn much about ourselves and our minds.
People of the Lie - M. Scott Peck
In this absorbing and equally inspiring companion volume to his classic trilogy—The Road Less Traveled, Further Along the Road Less Traveled, and The Road Less Traveled and Beyond—Dr. M. Scott Peck brilliantly probes into the essence of human evil. People who are evil attack others instead of facing their own failures. Peck demonstrates the havoc these people of the lie work in the lives of those around them. He presents, from vivid incidents encountered in his psychiatric practice, examples of evil in everyday life. This book is by turns disturbing, fascinating, and altogether impossible to put down as it offers a strikingly original approach to the age-old problem of human evil.
The Anger Trap - Les Carter
It's easy to identify rage in people who lose their temper at traffic jams, unruly children, unresponsive coworkers, and unrealistic bosses. But we may not recognize more subtle manifestations of anger, such as being uncomfortable with loose ends, acting impatiently, or being overly critical. That is anger, too. And, as is so often the case, angry folks don't seem to realize that the behavior causing them problems at home or at work actually stems from unrecognized and unresolved pain and emotional injuries from the past. Is all this negative emotion inevitable, or are there choices about how to respond, choices that can improve personal relationships as well as emotional health? The Anger Trap is a landmark book that strips away the myths and misconceptions about anger and reveals how you can learn to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger so that you may choose—or help someone else to choose—a better, more spiritually enlightened path. The Anger Trap examines the root causes of anger and can help you realize your patterns and break the destructive cycles of criticism, frustration, and irritation that hurt you and others around you. Drawing insight from timeless spiritual wisdom as well as cutting-edge research, Dr. Carter offers practical techniques to free you from anger, its hidden insecurities, fears, and selfishness and thereby improve the quality of your home and workplace life. The book clearly illustrates how the change process works and The Anger Trap is filled with real-life examples of the ways people have come to terms with their anger by applying the concepts Dr. Carter outlines.
Love’s Whipping Boy: Violence and Sentimentality in the American Imagination - Elizabeth Barnes
Working to reconcile the Christian dictum to "love one's neighbor as oneself" with evidence of U.S. sociopolitical aggression, including slavery, corporal punishment of children, and Indian removal, Elizabeth Barnes focuses her attention on aggressors--rather than the weak or abused--to suggest ways of understanding paradoxical relationships between empathy, violence, and religion that took hold so strongly in nineteenth-century American culture. Looking at works by Herman Melville, Frederick Douglass, Nathaniel Hawthorne, and Louisa May Alcott, among others, Barnes shows how violence and sensibility work together to produce a more "sensitive" citizenry. Aggression becomes a site of redemptive possibility because salvation is gained when the powerful protagonist identifies with the person he harms. Barnes argues that this identification and emotional transformation come at a high price, however, as the reparative ends are bought with another's blood. Critics of nineteenth-century literature have tended to think about sentimentality and violence as opposing strategies in the work of nation-building and in the formation of U.S. national identity. Yet to understand how violence gets folded into sentimentality's egalitarian goals is to recognize, importantly, the deep entrenchment of aggression in the empathetic structures of liberal, Christian culture in the United States.
Male Fantasies - Klaus Theweleit
This second volume of Theleweit's ground-breaking examination of proto-fascist 'Freikorps' novels spans disciplinary lines by examining historical documents from a unique combination of feminist and psychological perspectives. While the text is intellectually weighty, Theleweit manages to avoid the verbal dryness inherent in the subject. His thesis is outrageous, illuminating and largely coherent. A must read for aspiring academics and cultural historian
Faces of the enemy: Reflections of the Hostile Imagination - Sam Keen
This book shows how ordinary and seemingly decent people can be stirred to hate and even to kill their neighbours, using the twisted caricatures of propaganda posters, biased cartoons, and distorted images served up in print and on screen. In pictures and in text, noted philosopher and Jungian Sam Keen delves beneath legitimate grievances and questions of right and wrong to get at the psychological mechanism of enmity itself.